


Always Been You

by Anonymous



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Baby angst, Depression, F/M, FLUFF EVENTUALLY, Hermione runs away, New York, old loves
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-11
Updated: 2021-02-11
Packaged: 2021-03-17 23:41:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,290
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29358918
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: After the war, Hermione runs away. Five years later, a familiar face breaks down her carefully hidden life.
Relationships: Hermione Granger/Ron Weasley
Comments: 17
Kudos: 21
Collections: Tag(line) You're It! Competition





	Always Been You

**Author's Note:**

  * In response to a prompt by Anonymous in the [Tagline_Youre_It_Comp_2020](https://archiveofourown.org/collections/Tagline_Youre_It_Comp_2020) collection. 



> **Prompt:**
> 
> "Sometimes what you're looking for is right where you left it." (Sweet Home Alabama)
> 
> The moment I saw this prompt I knew it was for me! I know this isn't a popular pairing so I hope I did it justice! 
> 
> Thanks as always belong to my beta who shall remain nameless for now! I own nothing and all mistakes are my own!

_ 4 May 1998 _

When the dust had settled, the dead buried, and the Death Eaters had all been locked away, Hermione had fled. She left a short note on the kitchen table at the Burrow, telling everyone she had gone to Australia to find her parents and would be back once she had found them. The truth was, there was no way to retrieve her parent’s memories. She had known before she ever took them that there would be no reversing it. Hermione had done what she needed to do to protect them and had accepted it as much as she could in the few weeks before the war ramped up. She had told no one.

There was so much pressure, people pulling at her from all directions once the final battle had been fought and it had become overwhelming. Kingsley had offered herself, Harry, and Ron spots with the Aurors, no NEWTs needed. Her two best friends had jumped at the opportunity and signed up as soon as they could. Hermione had told them all she just needed time to decide what she wanted to do. The truth was, she had decided to run the moment Voldemorts body had hit the floor. She couldn’t be who they all wanted her to be.

As she accepted the Portkey the dour-looking woman in the Department of Transportation handed her, her heart dropped at the thought of Ron. He would never forgive her and she supposed she didn’t deserve to be forgiven. Their relationship was over before it even had a chance to start. Yes, he had abandoned them on the hunt for the Horcruxes but his voice screaming for her, begging to be taken in her place in Malfoy Manor had wiped away any doubts that had lingered in her mind about his accountability. She had left a note for him, hidden away under his pillow in his attic room that only had two words written on it.

_ I’m sorry. _

No one would understand and it was easier to cut and run than try to explain that she needed space, she needed to heal. She felt like she was drowning like the world was closing in on her and she couldn’t catch her breath. Hermione had kept everything of hers packed away in the small beaded bag, leaving only Harry and Ron’s belongings behind and the moment she felt the hook behind her navel, a tear fell down her cheek.

_ 4 April 2003 _

Gripping the handle of her door tightly, she pulled up on it slightly as she shut it. Wiggling her key into the lock, she turned it until she heard the quiet  _ click _ . Pulling her hood up over her head and checking to make sure her bag was zipped shut, Hermione headed down the dim hallway of her apartment building. It was only eight in the morning and she could already hear the thumping bass of her neighbours music down the hall. As she made her way down the rickety stairs, she groaned as she glanced out of a window and say that it was pouring outside. Trying to decide if she would late if she went back upstairs for her umbrella, Hermione pulled her hood tighter around her head and headed out into the downpour.

There weren’t many people on the streets in Brooklyn and Hermione preferred it that way. Fewer people to dodge, fewer men calling out to her on the streets. The pounding rain was soothing in a way. It felt like all of her sins, all of our mistakes were being washed away. The bookshop she worked at was only five blocks from her apartment and by the time she was pulling her keys out of her bag and unlocking the door, Hermione was drenched. Pulling her bag from over her head, she sat it behind the counter and shed her coat, handing it on the rack by the front door. She flipped the sign from ‘closed’ to ‘open’ and headed towards the stock room to see if there were any books to put away.

In the almost five years since Hermione had left not only England but her magic behind, she had led a quiet life. The Portkey she had used had taken her to Quebec first. She had stayed in the province briefly before making her way down to the states and settling in New York. Thankful that she had some muggle money, she had been able to convert it all with no problems and was able to familiarize herself with the not only the city she lived in but the culture. It had been incredibly easy to leave magic behind. Her wand was in a locked boxed under a floorboard in her tiny one-bedroom apartment and had been there since the day she moved in. Hermione knew there was a thriving magical world in New York but had kept a healthy distance from it.

The one thing Hermione had done before she left had been to go to Gringotts, apologize, and pay for a mail ward to be put on her. She didn’t want to know what was happening and she didn’t want to be found. Five years later and she was sure no one was looking for her anymore and even if they were, they wouldn’t recognize her anymore. Gone were the long bushy curls and in their place was a long bob that she kept straight except for on the weekends she didn’t work and rarely left her apartment.

Her day passed in a flurry of customers, deliveries and training a new employee who would be taking the weekend shifts. By the time Hermione closed the shop up for the day, she was exhausted. Grabbing some Chinese take-away on her way home, she was ready to spend the rest of the evening and the entire next day doing nothing but sitting on her sofa and watching trashy American television. Turning on to her street, she felt a tingle deep in her magical core, something she hadn’t’ felt in a very long time. The hair on the back of her neck stood up and for the first time, she regretted not keeping her wand on her.

Trying to look around without drawing too much attention, she pulled her hood up again. On the corner, just a few feet from the entrance to her apartment was the unmistakable Weasley red hair and the messy Potter locks. Sliding down an alleyway before they could see her, Hermione leaned against the brick wall, her heart racing and her breathing heavy.

How had they found her?  _ Had _ they found her? Was it a coincidence that they just happened to be in Brooklyn, right outside of her apartment?

Chancing a glance around the corner, she breathed a sigh of relief. They were gone. Walking quickly, she entered her apartment building and took the three flights of stairs two at a time.

* * *

“Hey Mi? A customer is asking for you.” Ali, the new employee told her, poking her head around the corner of the stock room.

Standing with a groan, Hermione rubbed her lower back before heading upfront to deal with the customer.

As she looked up, dark brown eyes locked onto the dark green and her heart lept into her throat.

“Harry.”

He looked up and a smile tugged at the corner of his lips before a dark look crossed his face.

“Do you have a break soon?” He asked her, his voice giving nothing away.

Glancing up at the clock that hung on the wall behind the counter, she grimaced. “I can probably step out now as long as Ali doesn’t mind watching the story alone.”

She excused herself quickly and sought Ali out. Explaining quickly that she needed to take a quick break but wouldn’t be gone soon. Hermione wasn’t one for taking breaks so she wasn’t surprised when the younger girl told her to take her time.

Grabbing her jacket and bag, she motioned for Harry to follow her. There was a small coffee shop just down the street that she favoured. After both had placed their orders, they sat with their drink at a small table in the back corner in silence. A million questions, excuses, and apologies were swirling through Hermione’s mind as the quiet between her former best friend continued. Finally deciding to just bite the bullet, she took a deep sip of her latte.

“What are you doing here, Harry?” she asked quietly, still not able to make eye contact.

He groaned and scrubbed his hands down his face. “That’s all you have to say? Asking me why I’m here? Why are  _ you _ here, Hermione? You just let with some half-arsed note saying you needed space and no one has heard from you since.” His voice was rising now and Hermoine’s face heated.

“We didn’t know if you were alive or dead! We couldn’t send you any letters to try to find you. We finally figured you had a block on your mail through Gringotts. You weren’t in Canada which was where your Portkey took you.”

Harry seemed to have run out of steam by that point and lowered his voice.

“It’s been hell without you, Hermione. So much has changed and you haven’t been there to see it, to be apart of it.”

The way his voice hitched at the end broke Hermione’s heart. She hadn’t wanted to leave him or Ron but explaining how she had felt then, how she still felt some days, was impossible.

“I’m sorry,” she told him quietly “I know that probably doesn’t mean much to you anymore and I did miss you, all of you, more than I can say.”

He huffed out a breath. “Then why didn’t you come home? Why couldn’t you have just sent an owl letting us all know you were alive and okay?”

Staring down at her drink, she let the words flow out of her mouth. “I know it’s no excuse but the longer I was gone, the easier it was not to write. In my head, everyone moved on, thought about me on occasion, but had carried on with your lives. I was in a bad place Harry when I left,” she looked up at him then, tears in her eyes that threatened to spill over.

“You had so much anger, so much sadness, I didn’t want to add to that which what I felt like were trivial. You had lost everyone-”

“I hadn’t lost you,” Harry interjected quietly. “I always thought I would have you by my side and now, you don’t know anything about my life and that eats at my heart every day.”

Tears fell freely now, dripping from her cheeks onto the table. “I needed space. I know that’s stupid but I did. I couldn’t breathe Harry. I had told you all a lie and when the war was over, it all came back and I needed to leave. I couldn’t fix my parents, and I knew that when I cast the charm. They can never get their memories back.”

Harry’s face was stricken when she glanced up at him. “Why didn’t you tell anyone? Why didn’t you tell  _ me _ ?”

She smiled a little. “And have you take on that burden as well? Never.”

He reached a hand across the table and tugged hers free and squeezed. “And now? Do you still feel like you can’t breathe?”

Hermione’s breath caught in her throat at his question. “I don’t know anymore. I just feel like I’m...existing. I go about my day at work and then I go home. I don’t have friends, boyfriends, I have nothing but work.” She wiped a stray tear before continuing.

“Here, no one knows who I am. I’m just Hermione, a British girl. Not the brightest witch of the age, not part of the Golden Trio, just a regular girl. I’ve never even seen the magical parents of New York, I’ve stayed away. I don’t even do magic anymore, it’s too painful when every spell I would cast would remind me of home.”

Looking up, she found Harry’s eyes bright with unshed tears. Seeing him made her heart hurt, she wanted to ask about his life, if he was married, had kids. She wanted to ask about Ron who she had thought about every day, all day since she had left but the thought that he might have married, no matter how selfish it might be, she didn’t know if she could handle knowing. Harry cleared his throat and pulled his hand away from hers, her hand already going cold with the loss of contact.

“I have to get back to the Ministry here but can I at least have your address so I can see you before I leave?”

She chewed on her lip for a moment. If she gave him her address, he could pass it on to Ron and Hermione wasn’t sure she was ready for that confrontation. Her heart and magic ached to see him but after the way she left, she didn’t deserve any sort of closure with him. Despite her worries, she nodded her head and pulled out a spare piece of paper from her bag and a pen. Writing her address quickly, she passed it across the table to Harry who glanced down at it briefly before putting it in his pocket, his face giving nothing away.

“I’m home most nights by seven.” She told him quietly.

Harry stood, stopping to squeeze her shoulder and then he was gone. Hermione laid her head on the table next to her coffee and breathed deeply, hoping the tears that were threatening to spill over would hold off until she was able to finish work and go home. Blowing out a breath, she drained her cup, grabbed her bag and headed back to work.

* * *

Harry hadn’t said when he might come by, so Hermione tried to go about her evening after work as normally as possible. She had grabbed a pizza on her way home though she had no appetite and had merely picked at it. The telly held no interest, just background noise to her pacing. She had given up hope that he might stop by that evening and had begun readying herself for bed. Her hair was thrown up on top of her head in a messy bun and one of Rons old Chudley Canons shirts, the only thing she had kept of him, hung down to the middle of her thighs when a knock at the door brought her up short.

She held her breath, thinking she had imagined it after hoping Harry would stop back by all evening and then she heard it again. Hermione walked slowly across her small apartment, her hand hovering over the gold-plated doorknob for just a second before she pulled it open.

He was taller or maybe it just seemed that way to her. His hair was a bit longer than it normally had been and he had some scruff on his face. His bright blue eyes were staring at her, giving nothing away about what he was thinking or feeling seeing her after five years of silence, five years of her absence.

“Ron?” she said her voice barely above a whisper.

A silence descended between them, he was looking her up and down and she was taking in his attire, trying not to make eye contact. He looked good, always gangly he had filled out and his shoulders were broad and strong, his arms were muscular and she could even see a tattoo or two peeking out from where his sleeves were rolled up at his elbows. He looked good. Chancing a glance up at his face, she found him staring at her.

He took a slight step back and one hand came up to pinch the area between his eyes, a grimace on his face.

“Harrys married. He and Pansy Parkinson, crazy I know but they’re good together. They have a little boy, he’s one his name is James. I’m Godfather but they still haven’t named a Godmother, I think they’ve been waiting for you.”

She didn’t even try to stop the tears that were rolling freely down her cheeks.

“Ginny’s playing for the Harpies, shes their star chaser. Travels all the time of course and it drives mum batty that she doesn’t have any plans to settle down. George had a rough go of it for a year or so but he’s pulled himself up and opened a few more joke shops, one in Hogsmeade, one here in New York, one in California, and Russia.” He took a deep breath before continuing.

“Charlies still in Romania, Bill and Fleur have two kids now, a girl and a boy. Percy quit the Ministry and now works at Hogwarts as the Potions professor. Luna and Neville are together, they haven’t got married yet but it’s only a matter of time. He teaches Herbology and Luna his the new matron in the hospital wing.”

Ron took another deep breath and stepped towards her. “And me? I’m Head Auror now. I know that probably shocks you, it does most everyone. They think it should be Harry but he took a step back when Pansy got pregnant, didn’t want to be such a big target anymore.”

Trying to keep the shock she felt from showing on her face, she just wiped the tears from her face.

“After you left I was a mess, Hermione. I didn’t handle your disappearance well. But finally, I pulled myself together, went back to Hogwarts and buckled down. I studied and passed all my NEWTs with O’s without you there to help. I joined the Auror’s with some of the highest scores since Harry’s dad and Sirius joined them. I did that all without you.”

His words stung. They weren’t said with any accusation, with no malice but they cut her right down to her core. He hadn’t needed her, he had a life that he had built for himself and she hadn’t been there to watch it, to help.

“Ron, I’m sorry. I just needed-” he cut her off.

“Harry told me what you said and I can even understand all that. It hurt like hell, Hermione. I loved you so much and I know I was an idiot, I didn’t deserve you. You wouldn’t have been happy with me then. I was lazy, entitled. I had been cruel to you at times during school when you were doing nothing but trying to help me. And then when we were on the hunt, I abandoned you and Harry both.”

He took another step closer to her, her breathing became erratic.

“I’m not the same man I was five years ago and I just need to ask you one thing.”

Looking up into his blue eyes, she nodded. “Anything.”

“Did you find what you were looking for?”

This brought her up short. She had expected cruel words, a mocking question asking who she thought she was. This though, this was asked with kindness, his eyes were still full of love like they had been the last time she had looked into them.

“I think it was right where I left it.” The moment the words left her mouth, Ron’s lips crashed down onto hers. He pulled her tightly against him with one arm, the other hand holding the back of her head. The kiss was like coming home, it was what she had missed all this time.

They wouldn’t be able to fix things in one night, with one conversation but Hermione decided at that moment, wrapped around Ron Weasley, that she was done hiding and ready to go home.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading!


End file.
